Ramblin'

About to embark on this summer's great adventure....

We leave tomorrow from here, to NYC, then to Munich, then on to Sarajevo, then to Dubrovnik, then to Rome.

It is tiring trying to remember if you picked up all medications, have enough small bottles for the toiletries, have taken enough money...where are the passports, did I bring enough underwear....etc etc etc. This list is endless. But I am so excited. I haven't been overseas in ages. And I don't count last summer...honeymoons are the exception!

The Bean is also headed for a vacation of his own, at Uncle Keiths. He seems to like it there. Thank heavens he's so easygoing. He just sniffed the place out, and then plunked down and slept on the kitchen floor, just like h e does at home!

Arrivederci....see you when we see you!

nyc

I am writing this post from the road, as I am in NYC this week.

This class is interesting, although I do feel a bit out of place.

My favorite thing to do in NY is walk the streets. (No, my dirty-minded constituency, NOT like that!)

I just like walking around seeing what is there. There is so much to see.

I walked down to ground zero today, as it is very close to my class, and I was surprised to see that they have it largely blocked off due to all the construction. I could only peer through some corrugated metal where windows had been cut out. I didn't have much time, either...only about 20 minutes or so--to get there and back...and look--I wasn't there but for a moment or two.

It amazed me to see & hear the people streaming past...talking of the weather, their shoes, dropping the f* bomb for no reason, and complaining about the construction. It was like....everything.... was....normal. It was sorta like a tree that sustained heavy damage, and then just grew right around it. You can still see the damage, but healthy progress forms on all sides.

I don't know what I expected, but to come face-to-face with the resiliency of the human spirit right after lunch wasn't one of them.

DONE

I am off...to a great adventure in NYC tomorrow. I have so many people who want my time, I can't even satisfy them all...poor me!

I do have to say, after a week without the husbandy--it sure is lonely here without him around.

And I have decided that one of the nicest things about being married is the ability to give your all. Give 100%. Or at least 90%.

I like to give my all, and I always have. But it is weird with friends, sometimes, especially new friends, because when I like someone, I like them...and I would do anything for them--I go right to 90%, right away. But some people don't reciprocate. They don't feel the same. They don't give their all. They give 20%. Or, some give 50%. And those percentages are hard to navigate. what if you give 90%, but they only give 20%? Hard feelings, that's what. But there are no guarantees.

being married means 100%. I like knowing that we are both at 100%. We got each other's backs. And that is great....no guessing, no wondering...it is a given. And I like operating at 100%.

so close, and yet....

well, I have one more week.

But I have so much to do, I can't even see straight. And, I am having the whole...it's-so-close-to summer,- I-don-wanna-disease.

Husband is off gallavanting for work and the poor loved starved O-saur is sitting on the keyboard, so I will have to try this another time.....

back to sucksville

Well, once again today I was dismayed by the total inability of the people I work with/for to act like normal, logical humans.

I am not happy at this place. I know that. I just want to be able to deal. I keep feeling like I am being dumped on--which doesn't make me feel good. Doesn't make me be myself. doesn't make me want to be friendly to people, or be nice to them. I am really not social at work. I dress like a schlub because I don't want to ruin every piece of clothing I own, so I also always look like a bum too.

If I can just make it through next week without breaking down, at least I will have the summer. Appoximately 10 weeks off. Maybe I will be able to breathe for a bit. I just have to remember, it is only 9 months or so of actual work. Not even that much, counting holidays during the year.

I need to get some books on the art of zen and stock up during the summer.....

the war of the stars

tha sista was in town this weekend. well, to be fair, ONE of the sistas was in town this weekend, and we all went to see 'Sith part III at the UPTOWN. for those of you who don't know, the UPTOWN theatre is an antique theatre in the heart of the city with a huge, wrap-around, 3 stories high screen. The seats actually rumbled in the first few moments of the movie.

I have to take a moment to gush. The movie was so well done. Right down to the design elements...familiar space ships, familiar settings--all tracing back to the original movies. They answered all the questions, pulled through all the threads, tied everything up. It was truly epic, and basic, and (unlike I & II) somehow believable. Understandable. And, it wasn't exactly how I thought it would go down. Even though I knew how things had to turn out, I still found myself hoping Anakin wouldn't go down that road. I was enthralled. And, somewhat surprised.

I found myself being sad at the same time that our kids wouldn't be able to experience this type of excitement about a movie. I mean, this was a cultural phenomenon that has now come to an end. I'm sure some time 20 years from now, the Lucas estate will grant permission to do the last three, but I am not sure that will be the same.

Cheers to George Lucas, who truly reinvented what it means to go to the movies. Thanks.